I Use to Love H.E.R

I said a hip hop Hippie to the hippie The hip, hip a hop, and you don’t stop, a rock it out Bubba to the bang bang boogie, boobie to the boogie To the rhythm of the boogie the beat With that, I was hooked. I didn’t understand what it was, all I know that…

Floydisms

I honestly wish I had written down some of his Floydisms. I just remember a few but whenever I think of him it feels like him bossing us around, silly words, laughter, and love. This one-time Tonya and I tried to do laundry on New Years day and he caught us and went off! We didn’t know it at the time but apparently it was bad luck to do laundry on the first day of the year I mean he was big mad and could not believe we would do such a thing. Our favorite quote from that day was “I can’t believe y’all up I here doing laundry! Niggahs in this house is crazy!!” lmao!! To this day we call every New Years day to make sure that no one in our house does laundry, we laugh, and the story is retold again and again.

Grease

Going to the movies is one of my favorite experiences. Walking up to the theater, staring  at the marquee, going through the heavy  double doors and past the red velvet ropes. From the smell of popcorn and butter, to anticipation of the movie. The escape from a current reality is the most promising part of…

Unpack

You can’t just take a kid from a bad situation and plop them into a better environment and expect them to act as if they had always lived that life. You can’t expect them to just be grateful to be there and adjust. They have so much to unpack. Clothes and whatever other tawdry belongings they might have will be swiftly and neatly stowed away. What remains in the darkest unseen corners of the last trash bag they brought with them is all the years of pain, hurt, shame, and anger they have been dragging behind them. I stayed away and didn’t tell them where I was that weekend. I returned after school that Monday, I knew that I probably wouldn’t live there long, and I knew I didn’t want to go back to my mom. I had no idea what I was going to do. I felt numb nothing mattered except finishing school, so I could get into a college to get away from everyone and everything I knew

Baptism

The James and Archers of Greenburgh, NY and have been members of Union Baptist church forever. I mostly attended service with Grams, but there were times I went with an aunt or a neighbor. To this day, I don’t recall why on this particular Sunday, Grams did not attend service, all I knew I needed…

Almost Grown

I had all the hormones, emotions, and anger of a normal teenage girl added with a difficult childhood, abuse, and neglect. In my mind I was GROWN. I examined many of the “adults” in my life and was confident that I was their equal or superior in a multitude of ways. I watched how many of them lived their lives and vowed that I would not live my life like them. They would serve an anti-example of how to live my life. I worked, saved money, I was responsible for two kids, and I knew Education was the key to changing my situation because no one was coming to save me. I would have to save myself, not my “real” mom, not my aunts, not my dad, no one. I would have to save me.

Dogs

pho•bi•a: /fōbēe/ noun an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something. The thing about having a phobia is this misconception that it is an irrational fear. My fear of dogs are far from irrational. As a kid, I was always skittish… It didn’t matter (and still doesn’t) if it’s the cutest of cats…

Hair

Stacks were a hair style from the late 80s and early 90s and if your stacks were on point it could totally change your young life. It sounds crazy right that a hair style could have such a big impact on one’s life but it’s true. Lol! As we talked she mentioned how when she transitioned from getting her hair done in the kitchen to actually going to a real shop she got her first boyfriend!! We laughed but she said, “it was like magic”. One day she was just regular old Candy, and nobody was checking for her but the day she her stacks got done right “it was on and poppin!”

On My Own

Its odd but I have never been a super fan of another human. Yes, I really enjoy the things that artist create, but I have never owned a poster of anyone. I have never been a crazy screaming teen fan girl, hell I barely put my hands in the air because I actually do care. I would find myself at Saints skating rink bopping along to music in the party room looking at the total immersion and joy of my friends and wondering what that must be like. To allow yourself to just be so completely into a person or song that you lose your mind when they walk in the room or you simply hear the song.

Paper Dolls

Happy Birthday Ms. Diana Ross! “You can’t just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream. You’ve got to get out there and make it happen for yourself.” – Diana Ross As a child, Diana Ross could do no wrong in my eyes. She was beautiful, graceful, glamorous, and was a…