Author Archives: Latrice

Trust

Social trust is the glue of society. This form of trust allows people to live and work together, feel safe, and belong to a group. It’s kind of funny when you take a moment to consider that without trust our entire country and way of life would crumble. Our ability to trust in money, a simple piece of linen, to believe that it holds value allows economies to flourish. Our ability to trust politicians and leaders creates a stable society and the absence of that trust can lead to division, public outcry, and can be the basis for the total destruction of a civilization.

Exhaling

I will admit that sometimes when I am on a trip or out in the world being my glorious adventurous self, there might be a sunset that makes me long for a companion in that moment. Yet, I wouldn’t trade the entire trip for the little bit of sadness I experience in that moment….

Mine to Me

I know many suggest that you simply rid yourself of all expectations and be open to love. But I really just don’t understand how one is supposed to just magically want that which you don’t naturally want. We should all have standards and expectations, healthy and realistic expectations are a requirement. So then How? How in this era of standards, perspectives, and expectations are we afforded the opportunity to lay claim and how do we allow ourselves to be claimed?

Hustle Hard

I love to live life, to read, to travel, to enjoy every moment with my kids, and always create new memories. To do these things I need money, so I have ambition but its limited. I am not willing to work more hours, I am not willing to have less time with my kids, nor am I willing to sacrifice my personal time. I used to feel odd. Like I needed to be doing more. Like I needed three different revenue streams. Like I needed to be this new ambitious woman. Women had fought for the right to be all those things and here I am squandering all the opportunities they toiled for. This used to send a symphony of “You Are Not Good Enough” reverberating through the echo chambers of my mind. Especially when I first left grad school.

Mr. Abandonment

I was always the one that ended things. I would stop the abandonment from happening. I cannot recall a time in my life where the other party ended a relationship with me (this happened before Mr. kayak). I ALWAYS did the leaving. I would never allow it to happen. NEVER. I had become something like an oracle or a prophet. I would always be analyzing the relationship and gaging where we were to ensure if things took a turn that I would be the one to recognize the inevitable end and snuff things out in a logical manner. Not this time. I let it be what it was. I didn’t try to organize it or plan how it would end. He simple moved on and I accepted it.

Mr. Particular

Then there were the remotes, he had four and each had a specific location and direction they had to be placed in. Next was the trash, which was not allowed to actually be put into the trash can. Gradually over a few months he rolled more and more rules for life with him. I initially thought that I could handle it that he was a great guy with just a particular way he liked things to be. I grabbed a book on dating people with OCD and watched a few videos and figured that everyone has good points and bad points, he was just a little OCD, I could deal with that.